I sat at my desk and opened my calendar to update the week ahead. The empty cells of the upcoming days were filled one task at a time. The list on the first few days was task oriented, a checklist of to-dos. The end od the week was filled with fun and activities with my husband. The last days of the off-season were upon us. I flipped the purple pages of my planner to reveal the beginning of the next week. My hands began to shake, my eyes filled with tears. The last days of the off-season were upon us.
I looked at my calendar, and the past fear and anger rose within my entire being. The memories stacked deep in my subconscious bubbled up lying heavy on my heart. The pain was raw and fresh. The tears stung. The black cloud of dread engulfed me.
Spring Training begins today. My husband left at 4:30 am to start six weeks of ten to twelve hour days. Leading into the season of 162 games in 180 days. We literally go from days of no work to working all day. Our quantity of time together dramatically decreases.
The house is eerily silent, just like every year. In years past this day brought extreme dread and anger. When he left, I was left at home alone with three little boys. It meant no quantity or quality time with my husband. Now is different. Our lives have changed. My choice to see the positive in everything has altered my view of the future.
“Praise the Lord, my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name. Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all his benefits” (Psalm 103: 1-2)
God is the fountain of all that is good. Taking our eyes off of our concerns and focusing on his Holy name realigns our view. Stare at God’s goodness and power while praising the Almighty One. We remember his power within us when he is the target of our praise.
Once my praise gazed at the goodness of God and his almighty power I remembered the great things the Lord has done for us through out our time in baseball. My heart began to soar in the prospects of the season to come. The ladies I would be spending time with in the stands. The new families I would meet. The incredible staff of each of the ballparks I would visit. Ultimately, the goodness of God in each and every moment of my life created a grateful heart within me. God’s divine goodness is seen in every instant. We only need to focus on him and his power that is alive within us.
What can you do this week to refocus? Is it as hard for you as it is for me not to allow fear and anger to bubble up?
I am praying for us to praise God in all of our busy lives this week, in every circumstance. Love to you all my friends!