I have been married over 25 years and not all have been a joy. In the beginning of my marriage, I thought my husband was going to be everything I needed and I would be happy forever. NOT! Nor was I the one to meet every need of my husband. He was a good man and that is why I married him. We had a great friendship. Everyone loved him. He worked hard. We had fun together. Then life came at us fast, first a job change that took us to another state, then kids, followed by extensive travel with his job, and quite a few poor financial decisions among other things. We found ourselves at odds in every aspect of our married lives. We couldn’t even seem to be around each other without grinding of teeth and gazes of death.
The loss of our friendship kept us far apart. I found others to confide in and he kept everything inside while he piled through his career. It took a separation from one another to stop the madness that existed between us. We had such pride in the way others saw our relationship that there were many close to us that didn’t know we were separated. His job kept him away so much that it didn’t seem odd to others not see us together. Our children knew no difference because they also were not use to seeing us together very often.
I thank God that through counseling and dedication to return to church our relationship began to heal. It wasn’t a magical pill or spiritual moment that made it perfect. It was hard work, dedication and the rebuilding of our friendship that nurtured our love for one another.
Focusing on God as your stabling force, the center of where everything comes from increases your wisdom and respect; the wisdom of right and wrong, respect of ourselves and His ways. As our self-respect increases, our respect for our spouse does also. Purposeful focus on God as the center of our relationship with our spouse creates a rock solid foundation.
Having God at the center of our lives and our relationship has brought our marriage to a point of freedom to love the way we want to love one another and the love to flow over to others. Teaching Godly wisdom of marriage to others is one of our greatest joys. If you had asked me all those years ago when we were separated if I could see us, where we are now, submitted to God in our blessed marriage, I would have given you an emphatic NO! But now I see the hand of God in every move we make.
I thank God for being at the center of my life. I thank God for His mighty hand on our marriage. I thank him for a hardworking, God fearing husband that stands in God’s wisdom not his own. It is not easy to keep God at the center, but it is a choice that we can make daily. Even in the ugly times of self and marriage, we can choose to place God there. Are you struggling with keeping God at the center? Are you having a hard time giving up on being at the center of your life?
Lord, I thank you for being at the center of our lives. I pray that we continue to stand on you as our foundation. I pray for blessing on each and every person reading this. I pray that your Holy Spirit fill them and lead them in wise decisions in their relationships.
Beautifully said my friend! Such an inspirational message! ☺
Thank you!
Such a beautiful testimony!
It’s amazing how a marriage that seems totally broken can be healed by his Love and Grace when we seek him! I have learned this as well. Thank you for sharing
AMEN!!!
This is beautiful. You are a holy woman. and, we need three in marriage, the couple plus God! Let’s all pray for our marriages.
Praying for all marriages!!!
So glad God brought you and Dave through the storm. He works in amazing ways even when we feel like giving up. You have a beautiful family.
Thank you!
Fantastic Billy! Having just celebrated my 24th wedding anniversary, I can honestly say that “Happily Ever After” is a choice! What people don’t tell you is that is MARRIAGE is truly the union of two “great” FORGIVERS. 🙂 Love your blog posts so much! God bless you my friend.
Thank you Beth! You are so right about the union of two great forgivers!!! Keep forgiving and living a marriage of love!