The past weeks have been insanely busy. A lot of good stuff but chaotic and emotionally draining. The end of July my hubby and I got to see our oldest son for the first time in a year and a half. It has been a long time since I’ve had the privilege to touch his beautiful face. He has been on the adventure of a lifetime playing baseball in Europe and Australia. Our schedules prohibited all of us from being able to travel to spend time together. Thank God for technology because it allows me to at least see his face even if I cannot touch it. Difficult doesn’t even express the feelings of saying goodbye to him at a ballgame as he departed for the airport.
At the beginning of August, my BABY boy turned 21, a rite of passage for any young person but a kick in the gut for this mama. MY BABY!!! 21??? Where does time go?
Then two weeks later I turned 51. I am OVER 50. What??? I don’t feel 51. A few years ago a high school friend asked, “Do you feel as old as we are?” I responded, “No. Not until I look in the mirror and she laughs back at me.”
Not that I feel 20 or even 30 but 51? Oh, how ancient I believed my parents were when they were 51.
Over the hill.
Life is over.
Close to death.
Emotionally I was drained after these experiences. My thoughts were negative, full of pity and sorrow. These feelings are not normal for me. I felt desperate and wanted to get rid of them.
“Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I. ‘If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday. The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.” Isaiah 58: 9-11
Crying out to Jesus in times of need is a necessity. Throwing off the oppression that engulfs our spirits is required. Reaching out and helping someone else who may feel the same way, raises us out of the darkness. God is always with us, we only need to call on him. Our strength to overcome adversities comes from him. Being dependent on his spirit grants us the ability to share his love, peace, and joy. When we take the focus off ourselves and place the focus on him our view of circumstances changes.
With the feelings of pity and sorrow, I didn’t want to leave my room. When the phone rang I didn’t want to answer it. My friend confessed that she had been sad and angry about some family situations. She felt abandoned and lonely. The pressure of the situation was weighing heavily on her.
We cried out to the Lord for help in her situation. I prayed for her to feel the love and peace of Jesus. I prayed that joy would feel her to overflowing.
Hanging up the phone I felt exactly what I had prayed for her. We hadn’t talked about how I felt. We hadn’t prayed for my negative feelings. What we did was focus on her and on Jesus. I spent myself on her needs. God made me feel blessed by not looking at me and loving on her.
Are you feeling down?
Are you crying out to Jesus?
How can you focus on others and not yourself?
What are some things you have done serving others that make you feel joyful?
How can you show the love of God to others?
How can I pray for you?
Truth! Thankful for you.
I have been awake since 2:30 and can not go to sleep and something told me to check my emails, not social media, no texting but my emails and this is what I needed. Thank you so much for all of your posts and this is the first time I have commented but its what I have struggled with and need to read. All that you give is appreciated and sorry this hometown girl hasn’t let you know before now!
Thank you, Julie! Praying you got some sleep. It is so frustrating when your mind outruns the sheep you are counting! Blessings to you my friend.